- Comedians – It’s an unfortunate fact of life that most of us think we’re funny. Spoiler alert ! We’re not ! Please stop telling service people awful jokes , believe me their not landing and they never will !
- Friends – Amazingly just because you come to the same place all the time and we’re on a first name basis does not mean we have a lasting friendship or even the groundwork for one . Sorry.
- Interesting – This is another one of those unfortunate facts of life most of us are not that interesting . Amazingly though your daughters ballet recital may be a thrilling topic of conversation to you and yes you get points for at least being a good parent , it is mind numbingly boring to me .
- Helpful – Please don’t try to help service people , I know your heart is in the right place but we do things the way we do them for a reason. So please don’t bring your plates to the counter or build strange monuments with your dishes to supposedly make them easier to carry , If you want to help when our finished your meal you can slide your plate to the side of your place setting so I don’t have to lean over you but past that please just leave me to do my job.
- Charming – If your hitting on a waitress while she’s at work and unable to tell you to get bent , YOUR NOT CHARMING! I have never once in all the time I’ve worked in food service heard of waitress say ” I went on the most wonderful date with this cute charming customer I met at work the other night ” . It’s rude and embarrassing to both you and her just leave it out !